Another line from a hymn, When All Thy Mercies: "Thro' every period of my life Thy goodness I'll pursue, and after death, in distant worlds, the glorious theme renew."
The idea of pursuing God's goodness, whatever is happening around me, resonates with me. Like Paul promises in Romans 8:28, God will make everything work together for good for those who are called according to His purpose.
Somehow, God will weave the tragedy of Jolene's death into the beautiful design of eternity.
That faith—that affirmation—is what I must seek through these day. Today's meditation in Meditations for Survivors of Suicide included the prayer "When we stand stranded by the roadside of our shattered hearts, You promise, 'I will show you the way.'" I feel stranded, my heart is shattered, but God's promise is sure. He will show me the way to His goodness. When I am to weak to walk, He will carry me on the path.
Here on earth, I see the underside of the divine design, each event a knotted clump of dark thread.
After death, I will see the design beautiful beyond imagination. And with the countless multitudes, I will renew the theme of God's goodness.
Until then, I trust His purposeful goodness when all I see are tangled threads.