My heroine in Golden Dreams, my current WIP, Winnie Tuttle, is loaded with guilt from her family because she focuses on preparation for the 1932 Olympics instead of helping the family more. Even though she tells her coach (the hero), that like Eric Liddell in the 1924 Olympics, she feels God's pleasure when she skates.
Just this morning I realized that my current struggle mirrors what I am writing about Winnie. As I look at writing nonfiction, preparing a proposal and daring to dream that God has worthwhile for me to say, not in a fiction format.
I haven't questioned my calling like this since . . . perhaps since the early part of the millennium, when I was writing a book about the Montgomery bus boycott and wondering if it was time for me to give up this foolish writing dream.
Eight years and twenty-six books later, I have that answer. But nonficton is a different animal, and once again I doubt.
Yesterday I reached out to friends, asking them, "Do you think I have the gifts needed to write this kind of book?"
I didn't ask it that directly. And I got different answers. Some of them, yes! Some of them, I'm not sure.
Then I realized . . . as much as I would like a clear, neon-sign answer, God more often asks me to act on faith. He won't give me the assurance I crave. Any more than Winnie knew if her dreams of Olympic gold were well-founded or foolishness.
But like Winnie--like Eric Liddell--I feel God's pleasure when I work on this book. Published or not, bestseller or not, I am blessed as I write it.
***Normal giveaway schedule this week: 1 book given away for every five comments. Please answer the following question in your comment for an additional chance to win: Do you struggle with the question, what does God want me to do? Describe the journey a little bit. If you leave a comment and answer the question for both of today's posts, you will have four chances to win a book next week. I also must have your email address to send you notification.***